When I think that I just cant go on .... I get so lost in this thing called motherhood. It is by far the hardest task I have ever been given. I phrase it like that because I feel a job you apply for and can truly quit whenever you feel like. But being a mom well I desired to have children but it was God's design that allowed these children into my life, so therefor I feel it is the task that I have been given and as long as I am given today I need to continue the task to the best of my ability.
Having said all that today I have struggled with my task. I have given into my own tiredness and responded to my children with such harsh reaction. It seems that there are days when I can be so off and still surrender myself to what the Lord is asking of me for the sake of His children. but other days I just get so lost in selfishness that my response is purely my own strengths and it shows.
Thankfully I have learned over the years that despite these days I have hope. I can make the choice to call out to Jesus and ask for forgiveness and then in turn ask my children for forgiveness. I can only strive for being authentic with my children and others in my life. I am only human but I choose to live a life for Christ and with that comes the responsibility to often times humble myself and be real. I have never nor will I ever begin to think that I have all the answers but I will always choose to live a life that I hope will one day be deserving of the Lord to say well done...
In his and hands and grace.
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